Advice: "My wife is suspicious of my business trips and client dinners. It's ruining my marriage"

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Dear Quota Team,

My marriage is falling apart because of my job, and it’s starting to hurt my performance. I sell medical equipment across three states, which requires overnight travel 2-3 times per month and regular client dinners for relationship building. My wife has become increasingly jealous and suspicious, accusing me of “playing around” during business trips and questioning why I need to take clients to expensive restaurants. The accusations are completely unfounded, but the fights have escalated to the point where I dread coming home after successful business trips that should be celebrations. Last week, I had a huge argument the night before a major presentation because she found out I’d be traveling with a female colleague, and I was so rattled the next day that I bombed the demo. How do I save both my marriage and my career when my job requirements seem to be incompatible with my wife’s insecurities?

On the Road in Location Withheld 

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Dear On the Road,

Your wife’s insecurities are creating a destructive cycle that’s sabotaging both your relationship and career performance. A marriage built on constant suspicion and accusations isn’t healthy for either of you, regardless of your job requirements.

There's not much we can advise you on this personal issue here except that it sounds like you need immediate intervention through couples counseling where a neutral professional can help address her trust issues and your communication around work requirements. In the short term, you can increase transparency by sharing detailed itineraries, and perhaps try video calling home during trips to maintain connection. Good luck!

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