Each week, we bring you the most cringe-worthy sales moments from across the web. To submit your sales fail story for consideration,
I sell commercial HVAC systems and was running late for a big meeting with a hotel owner who'd been considering an upgrade for their property. Traffic was worse than expected, and I knew this guy had a reputation for being no-nonsense about punctuality. Panicking about losing the deal, I started speeding down the interstate, doing 80 in a 65 zone. Sure enough, flashing lights appeared in my rearview mirror. When the officer approached, I launched into a desperate explanation about my important business meeting and how much this deal meant to my family. I laid it on thick about supporting my kids and how losing this sale would devastate my month.
Somehow, it worked. I'm guessing because of my clean record. The officer let me off with a stern warning and told me to slow down. I arrived 20 minutes late to find the hotel owner waiting with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. I immediately started explaining about the traffic and getting pulled over, hoping for some sympathy. He cut me off mid-sentence: "Show me the ticket then."
"Well, actually, I talked my way out of it," I said proudly. He stared at me then shook his head. "Right. Getting pulled over but no ticket. That's convenient." He stood up and walked me toward the door. "Next time you're going to be late to a sales meeting, come up with a better excuse than that. We're done here."
Anonymous Location Withheld
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I sell telecom services to small businesses. One Friday afternoon, I walked (cold) into a restaurant. It was before business hours, and I was planning to catch someone before the evening rush started. The door was open but there was no one inside, so I walked in anyway and heard some noise behind a door. I knocked and a frazzled woman opened the door, immediately grabbed my arm, and whispered urgently, "Get inside, he'll be here any minute!"
Before I could explain who I was, she pulled me into the restaurant function hall where
about forty people were crouched behind tables and standing against walls. I realized I was now part of a surprise party, but I didn't want to speak up since it seemed the guest of honor would be arriving imminently. About a minute later, the woman yelled "He's here!" and everyone got quiet. As the door opened, forty people, including me, jumped up screaming, "SURPRISE!"
The birthday guy, who it turns out was one of the owners, looked shocked and thrilled as everyone rushed to hug him. I got caught up in the moment and congratulated him too. I decided that a surprise party wasn't a good time to pitch him, so I took a piece of cake I was offered, ate it, and then quietly snuck out. No sale, but that was some damn good cake. Sometimes the job has unexpected perks.
Anonymous Location Withheld
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I sell commercial insurance and had been interviewing for a position at a larger firm that would have meant a significant pay increase. After weeks of phone screenings, I finally made it to an in-person interview. I took a sick day from my current job so I could go.
I arrived at their office and was led to the hiring manager's small, windowless office. The moment I walked in, I could tell she was obviously sick. She was sniffling, coughing into her elbow, and grabbing tissues. She apologized, but mentioned that she was going on vacation next week and couldn't take any time off this week before she went. I went along with the interview, but I couldn't focus due to her constant sniffling and the fact that we were sitting three feet apart in a tiny office. Every time she coughed, I held my breath. I rushed through my answers, desperate to get out of there. The whole interview was just awkward, and I left knowing I'd bombed it.
Two days later, I woke up with a scratchy throat and congestion. I had to call my boss again, telling him I was "sick again." What followed were three miserable days of actual illness. I missed four total days of work. I didn't end up getting the job, all I ended up getting was sick.
Anonymous Location Withheld
